Update on goings on

I feel  like I haven't written in a while even though  things have been happening. 

First off let me start by saying the lice went and much easier than I thought Peanut looks amazing with short hair. 

 We have been on school holidays and having catch ups with friends and just relaxing. 

This wednesday backpacker stayed with the kids all day while I did day 1 of a 2 day positive partnerships workshop. 

This is a free program about how to better communicate with schools  how to tackle those tricky teachers and IEP's and how to know your rights and stand up for yourself with out getting emotional. For me its been so valuable Im a pretty proactive mum but sometimes you just get stuck or confused by the system and with Peanut next year attending two schools, Mainstream 3 days with an Aid some of the time and Early intervention the other two days this is going to come in handy. 

Im not super pleased with the mainstreams schools responses so far they have been a bit hit and miss my initial reaction to the school was good ( its big but pretty and well established nice trees and the kids seems okay) but then I found some flaws and I had people chirping in my ear " oh they are not a good school the students are messed up  blah blah the teachers can't control them"  and various other bits of wisdom (I didn't ask for) we live in a low socioeconomic area and there are children with all sorts of needs behavioral and emotional which is why I was actually told in the first place they perhaps would be better able to deal with a child with autism compared to the higher end schools with middle class students ( mainly people from working class pasts immigrating and pretending to be above their stations).  
Surely that makes sense that the funding allocation and understanding of special needs would be better at a school thats seen all sorts of children from all walks of life. yes / no?  
Meh who knows (not me).  Private is too expensive for us I don't want to send my son to catholic school due to the fact I might burn alive when I walk in. Id like to walk him to school and I've not heard great things about the other school in walking distance and its on a main road. There are a few others public schools  not to far away 5 - 10 minutes drive that have good reputations with special needs but I want to give his local school a chance. 

Any way I have started rambling back to the facts  

I now feel empowered and like I have the right tools to approach the schools and ask for an IEP or CAP meeting before next year and I will be ringing about it next week I want to know how much aide time and If we can meet the aide and teacher for next year and see the class room, I can bring my LAC along and therapy focus if I feel I need it. 

The  program also made me sad that so many parents and carers felt alone.  I have Skips and they have been a wealth of knowledge, support and understanding and because of this I feel positive and prepared. Some of these mothers and fathers were lost, never pushing for things they are able to receive no knowledge about programs and funding options they are entitled to. 

Part of me got angry at them. "where have  you been  why have you just been sitting back excepting this you have no right to complain if you never went out and scratched the surface and pushed for more information" some people had excuse after excuse and were so negative but then I was angry that the information can be so hard to find. By the end of the second day most people had made friends and started to become more positive and were ready to take the next steps but there were still a few that still had not grown like they were upset they didn't get that special and all mighty magic pill that was going to "fix their child"  any suggestion  people come up with was knocked down even though they had not tried it and that made me mad!  

I think its the lack of knowledge people have about what they can and cant apply for and the fact people aren't working together for each child individually because they don't know where to start. We are only at the beginning of my journey and Im ready  to roll Im nervous and excited and Im sure we will have good years and bad years but I feel better prepared. I also feel like Id love to be a part of the disability sector helping those familys and children get what they rightly deserve. 

In Other news Peanut started Early intervention ESC Thursday and did well the teacher mentioned "he has a few scuffles over compliance but things he will get there soon". 
He has a little boy in his class whom is the same age and will be attending with Peanut until the end of 2013 his mother seemed lovely. The others kids will be heading off to mainstream or esc year 1 at the end of this year as they had been there nearly two years and were close to or already 6.

On Thursday after school Peanut started speech therapy with his federal funded service provider. Peanut did really well considering he was tired. His therapist (now named Irish) used the words visual genius she said he has very good with nonverbal language (eyes gaze pointing etc - that surprised us) and also his vocab and pronunciation was good (this we already knew). 
There was one bit that nearly brought me to tears. The speechy started to play simon says and Peanut was doing really well then she wanted to stop and get him to go get something but Peanut wanted to continue and he said Simon says close your eyes, so she copied and then he said close mouth and close chin (lol) and finally close ears she helped him along with the simon says bit but I was so proud of him Ive never seen that side of him before he wanted to take control in the correct way and that to me was the first spark of proper joint play with anyone else outside the family and certainly the only joint play Ive seen that require verbal skills ... so cheers to that!

Options Options Options

 Will I always have to give peanut options so he can answer more complicated questions?

Probably not but its going to take some hard work!

Peanuts and Shrimples fav book at the moment is Norman the slug with the silly shell they have had it for years but only now is it halerious and Peanut reads it constantly (when I say reads I mean makes noises looks the the pages, scripts some lines from it and laughs a lot). Our speechy wants us to move onto conversations!! argh I feel these are YEARS OFF, YEARS !!!  Ages, Zonks, Miles away.

 We sort of know the whats this? and whos that (if they are right in front of us) although Peanut can be very specific  “Peanut what colour is norman’s shell?” (it’s a pink donut with sprinkles)…  waiting waiting .. “ what colour is it?” …….  “purple!” did he get it wrong? No not really, cause mummys fat fingers were closer to the purple sprinkles then any others and that’s what peanut probably thought I ment sometimes I think his brain works likes this ( please note I actually have no idea what peanut is thinking so this is just me guessing really)

what colour is it? what colour is it ?… Is she really seriously is she asking this again what the fuck! is she colour blind?  jesus woman! What fucking colour do you mean? its got blue and purple and orange and green and pink on it.. ohh wait let me just read you mind and guess “purple?” 

I thought I could start by asking questions like what happens next and what does he do now? and what does he use to help him fly all relating to the story he/we have read hundreds of times.

And its goes like this

“What does Norman do next Peanut?”

Waiting

 waiting

 waiting  

“What do you think he does next”

Waiting

 waiting

 waiting

“How does Norman get away from the bird?”

Waiting

 waiting

 waiting 

I can see Shrimples sitting there ready to burst! But he is amazing and knows Mummy will say his name if she is asking him a question and he knows it and he is sitting and biting his tongue  and still thinking his brother is amazing and he wants to be just like him. 

Sometimes I wonder if kids think Peanut is so so aloof its cool   ohh man this guy wont even answer questions talk to us or join in  he must be the coolest kid ever

 I give it another year before he really gets teased and kids  put two and two together

Hey he is not cool or aloof or mysterious like we thought he is just odd!

Older kids already do this they either baby him or tease him. I really hope and pray (even thought I don’t actually pray) that Shrimples can always look up to his brother and have an understanding that he is different and not less (thank you Temple Grandin) and I also hope shrimples never gets teased for being peanuts brother and is not ashamed of him. Any way all this is to come Im on a tangent

So after this going on a while and me seeing peanut getting annoyed and shrimples about to explode I give in and say 

“Peanut do you think Norman jumps up and down or slimes his way  out“

“Slimes his way out” he says with ease

I turn the page to reveal and answer and excitedly say

 “ OH YES !!! GOOD PEANUT, YES HE SLIMES HIS WAY OUT  that’s what Norman does next, He slimes his way out and gets away from the bird”

then we read for a bit I asked shrimples some questions he answers with no problem before I ask peanut another one I stop reading

 “Peanut what does Norman use to fly?”

Waiting

 waiting

 waiting   

“Peanut what do you think Norman will use to fly?”

Waiting

 waiting

 waiting

“Will Norman use pants or an umbrella to fly ?”

Waiting

 waiting

 waiting

 thinking 

 thinking 

 thinking

 I said umbrella last but really he knows the answer is pants but cause I said it last its in his mind and blarp out comes echolalia

“umbrella?!?”

"Try again, Will he use Pants or umbrella”

“PANTS!”

“yes that’s right he uses the pants as wings to help him fly”

 I end the story thinking OH MAN!! when will I have a conversational boy?

 Peanut ends the story thinking "OH MAN when will she stop asking me questions I knows she knows the answer too and aren’t that important any way”

And Shrimples ends the story Thinking  “Oh man that was a great story”

Side note: Peanut had his first show and tell today  he took in his book the teacher said she read the book to everyone and Peanut kept yelling out  “What happens next ?” “what does Norman do?”